OTHERS telling you to TOLERATE. Why?
✅ They have the upper hand or the advantageous position.
✅ They are the bullies, the users, the abusers, the pushers.
✅ They impose their will or opinion upon you. They control and deprive.
✅ They make you accept what is unfair, unjust or wrong.
✅ They want you to be submissive and to leave it to God or to those who are in power and control.
✅ They tell you to “turn the other cheek” or be “politically correct”.
✅ They allow others to take what is yours and tell you that it is OK.
If YOU choose to TOLERATE. What is the implication?
✅ There is discord.
✅ There is a bully or an abuser.
✅ There is someone or something you just do not like but you find him/her or the situation still useful to you. Someone deprived, cheated or insulted you and have not apologized. You tolerate.
✅ You can’t win yet. You are working towards a goal. You are not getting what you want. You wait for the opportunity to break away to be free or to conquer.
✅ You have accepted defeat, you gave up and chose the life of servitude.
Teaching tolerance does not win the fight against hate, bias, and prejudice. To be an agent for a prosperous and responsible change, the school system must teach and put emphasis on respect, kindness, gratitude, apology and forgiveness. Teaching tolerance creates a subservient individual. Primed as an easy victim for those who deprive, cheat and insult.
The bully learns from those who teach tolerance. He/she learns how to manipulate the new submissive ways that his/her victims have learned from their teachers. If you tolerate or put up with the bully, then for sure he/she will continue to antagonize, rile, vex, deprive and take advantage of your situation.
Without discipline, the bully sprouts and grows like a weed.
Preaching the freedom of choice and preaching tolerance goes hand in hand. They teach you that submission is the way to peace. Yes, the peace in a society where they impose and you willingly choose to obey, thereby creating no conflict for them.
There is no cooperation in tolerance. The people who want you to tolerate their impositions, say there is. The people professing tolerance identify the word with courtesy and appreciation. They also identify the word with patience. There is a fine line between patience and tolerance. Patience carries the ingredient of love whereas, tolerance does not. Patience assumes a connection, tolerance does not. A nurse may tolerate the ornery patient because that is her job. However, the wife of the ornery patient has patience because she loves him.
Patience will allow you to solve a problem, work your way out of a terrible situation or untie a hard knot. On the other hand, tolerance looks at the problem, the situation or the knot and simply accepts it. You improve with patience, you deteriorate with tolerance.
You can choose to tolerate the behavior of your companions or your community. That is your right. But never ever make the mistake of identifying tolerance for respect or kindness. Do not mistake diplomacy or being patient and cordial for tolerance. Do not mistake a negotiated truce for tolerance. Tolerance has its place. It plays a crucial part in our lives. Tolerance is beneficial only if you made a firm decision to make a change for the relief. It allows you to make a plan. There is a time for tolerance. But continued tolerance is cowardice.
On the other hand, tolerate or endure if you must, until you are able to negotiate a truce, free yourself from shackles of the situation or fight back. Fight, not because you hate or you are hated, fight because you are defending and protecting what and who you love and respect.
The dictionary defines tolerance as such:
noun: tolerance; plural noun: tolerances
- the ability or willingness to tolerate something, in particular the existence of opinions or behavior that one does not necessarily agree with. “the tolerance of corruption”
- synonyms: forbearance, toleration, sufferance, liberality, open-mindedness, lack of prejudice, lack of bias, broad-mindedness, liberalism; patience, long-suffering, magnanimity, sympathy, understanding, charity, lenience, leniency, lenity, indulgence, clemency, permissiveness, complaisance, laxness
- “an advocate of religious tolerance”
- antonyms: intolerance
- the capacity to endure continued subjection to something, especially a drug, transplant, antigen, or environmental conditions, without adverse reaction. “the desert camel shows the greatest tolerance to dehydration”
- synonyms: endurance of, acceptance of; resistance to, immunity to, non-susceptibility to, resilience to “tolerance to alcohol decreases with age”